Two months!!
Loving being two months old! And already a flirt with the ladies-- all over his first new friend, Beatrice Faxon.
You guys getting tired of the baby posts compliments of moi? At just two months in, it is still very much Baby Season for me! There is a lot to figure out and a lot of just going with the flow -- his little baby flow that is sometimes textbook, and other days all over the road. Ever does a lot of sleeping, a lot of eating and there a lot of diaper changes in our day!
As a new mom, I am beginning to wrestle with the concept of time. Time with him, family time, couple time, time to myself and even when I have the time to myself, allowing myself to really be present with myself. Shushing the little nagging worrywart voice that is always keeping an ear out or feeling a pull back to him. The feeling that, "Oh he's taking a nap so now I can tackle the list of things I've been wanting to do," and then feeling this mad rush against the ticking clock of him waking prematurely. Or even not. Three hours between when he eats goes by so quickly! And then figuring out childcare- times when Napper can be with him, and when he can't, who do I trust to leave him with? I have two amazing women, Sandra and Hilcy, who are baby nurses extraordinaire that have been helping us mostly at night, but now that the nights are getting easier-- he wakes once in the middle of the night now-- they have been coming during the day for some hours to give me a break. I have asked them to share their baby whispering tips, so stay tuned for that!
And then the pressure and the guilt of filling those hours when someone else is with him "meaningfully." That pressure I have been beating back! A manicure never felt so meaningful and I have never enjoyed it so much. Lunch with a friend- delightful! Time to write this-- an achievement! Going to yoga? Luxurious and also so essential for me staying balanced. It's all a balancing act is what I am figuring out. Each day is different and mostly it is all wonderful and heart exploding. Ever is also my greatest teacher -- of patience, of realizing I am not in control (of anything really!), of being more thoughtful and gentle and of prioritizing.
Parenthood really and truly is an incredible adventure, lesson and experience thus far!! Would love to hear from other parents on how you're doing and on what lies ahead... xox